Ok, I'm just gonna say it. We all need to just lighten up on ourselves for everything that we do in our lives. There are times that we compare our worst selves to the best we see in others. I was reminded just the other day that the "posts" we read or see on social media are just the "highlights" of that person's life. The posts rarely show the struggles they are going through. They rarely show how tough their life really can be at times. I'm not saying that people need to start publicizing all the "bad" that happens to them each and every day - (for example no one wants to hear about the cold shower I had to take this morning cuz someone flipped the wrong breaker switch and turned off the hot water heater…yeah, that was a great start of my day!) - I'm just saying that we need to be more realistic with the expectations we put upon ourselves.
We also need to be less "envious" of those who seem to have it all together. I promise you that after Miss Sally posted about having the most wonderful day ever - or whatever - the cat puked on the rug, the dog got out of the fence yet again, and the washer blew up. Yep, these things happen. I know because they happen to me all the time! I'm really not complaining, I'm just starting to realize that I should really stop comparing my "bad days" to other people's "great days".
I had a friend that once called me a "domestic goddess" cuz she thought I had it all together. She thought my life was all super organized and that nothing ever went wrong for me. Boy was she ever wrong! Little did she realize that on my bad days I called her for the support I so desperately needed at that time. She had plenty problems of her own and she was very willing to share her burden with me. After talking to her for a while, I realized that if she could go through all the bad in her life, I could get through the bad in mine.
As I have been trolling my Facebook account (yes another time waster, but at least I don't spend all day long on it!), I came across a post from a friend who had a daughter serving a mission in Italy. She and her companion had been using a particular bus route each day and on that bus was a man that seemed genuinely happy all the time. They were intrigued with this man and had made a decision to talk to him if the chance ever arose. That chance finally came when they found they were the only three passengers on the bus one day. They asked him about his life and the things that had brought him to where he was right now in his life. They found out this man had a very difficult past with many trials. They were really big trials too! My friend's daughter was blown away with the things this man had endured in his life. She asked him this very important questions that had an even more profound answer. She asked "If you have had such a difficult life why are you happy all the time? I have never seen you without a smile." He replied, "God wants me to be happy. Even though my life has been hard, I choose to be happy."
You see, being happy is a choice that we are given each and every minute of our lives. I could be really upset about how my hubby totally forgot my birthday yesterday, but I'm not - really, I'm not! I was so grateful and happy he took the time to bake a cake with the kids and build that happy memory with them. You see, I don't need a gift to make me happy - I'm more than thrilled that I got to witness happy memories being made between father and children to do something special for their mamma. Besides, having a cake built by my children and hubby, who don't know the first thing about doing something like that, will stick in my memory far longer than a "last minute purchase" would have ever filled my happy memory bank!
No matter your circumstances in life, you have to get through this life somehow. You can either go through your life mad or sad or grumpy, but those feelings won't change the fact you still have to go through whatever trial you have been given at that time. I agree with Elder Neal A. Maxwell when he said "We are here in mortality, and the only way to go is through; there isn't any around " (Ensign, May 1998, pg. 9) and with Sister Marjorie Pay Hinckley when she added "…the only way to get through life is to laugh your way through it. You either have to laugh or cry!....I prefer to laugh, crying gives me a headache!"
So mammas, take the advice from the video below. Stop being so hard on yourself for everything. You are doing so much better than you think you are. You deserve to be happy no matter what you are going through. God loves you for who you are and the efforts you are putting into your "mission" here on earth. Don't ever give up on yourself and quit trying to be like "Perfect Sally Neighbor" cuz in truth, "Perfect Sally Neighbor" is really trying to be just like you!
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(I have my 'little girl' picture to help remind me...do you have yours?)