Ahh! At last! A peaceful moment to myself! The hubby has taken the kids and has given me a free night to do as I wish. I could be doing ANYTHING....watching a movie, painting my toe-nails, scrubbing floors, visiting a friend....I tell you ANYTHING! What I really want to do is share my thoughts with you, my reader.
I feel honored that you would take a moment of your precious time that you could be doing anything you want, to read the thoughts that I choose to write in this post. I hope that they are insightful and that you feel you can share them. I also hope that you will be able to think about the things that I write and, in your own small way, take these words and help make your small part of the world a better place. A place where others can feel the love that our Heavenly Father has for all his children.
I recently heard a woman tell of an experience that she is placed in day after day. I will name this woman Joan (yes, the name has been changed to protect feelings etc.) Through no fault of her own, Joan is still single after a lifetime of kindness and love for others. Joan told of how her boss is "model gorgeous" and how men will run to open the door for her, or flirt with her, or even notice her. But when it comes to Joan, the men look the other way because, in their minds, she isn't "pretty". She has had men slam doors in her face because they didn't think her worth the time or effort for them to be a gentleman. True she is very "plain" as the world standards go, she is very tall, has a stoop, walks with a limp, and she is older. She said "I could be wearing a dress and have a flat tire and still people would drive right by." She went on to say, "why can't people look at me and see what is in my heart?"
People, this breaks my heart!!! Are we not all daughters of our Heavenly Father? Shouldn't we be treated like the princesses we have been created to be and not some trophy for a man to show off?
There is a music video that I just watched that defines what a "real" woman is. It isn't the profession she has chosen. It isn't how she looks or what she wears. It isn't what she watches or reads. It isn't who her friends are.
Woman is God's greatest creation! Woman was created last because God wanted the world to be absolutely perfect and it wasn't complete until woman was placed on this earth. God made woman beautiful. No matter what you look like - if you are a woman, YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL!!!
Please take a minute to watch this video and remember what makes YOU beautiful:
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Back to Joan. I have seen her do amazing things for children. She teaches the young children in my church and she is, in a word, AMAZING! She has the ability to calm a troubled child with just the sound of her voice. She has the ability to reach out to a rambunctious little boy and teach him about Jesus. She also has the ability to care for her aging mother. She has served this country in missions that can't be talked about. She faces daily life alone, without a man by her side, and she does it cheerfully. I cannot lie - I admire the strength of this woman. I know her reward in Heaven will be great. I only hope to be just a smidgen like her.
Thinking of her situation, I have been reminded of the many times that I "judge" or "criticize" others for being "different" or just plain not like me. My thinking has been wrong for a long time and I am starting to change. We have no right to judge or criticize others cuz we don't know what they are going through.
Something to think about:
What do you think when you see someone sitting alone across the room making no eye contact or even making an effort to converse with the other people? This person could be dressed "to the nines" and look so prim and proper. Do you think of this person as stuck-up or "too good" for everybody else? If this is what you thought, maybe you should stop yourself right there and ask the question "Do I really know who that person is? Does that person need a friend?"
Truth is, you don't know what has happened to that person.
Maybe they just lost a loved one and they are trying really hard to cope with such a difficult loss. They may feel that anything they say will trigger an unexplainable emotion. Maybe they are afraid that someone might say or do something that is hard to take in at this particular time.
Maybe that person is new to the area and doesn't know a single living soul there. They are looking for a friend, but are too shy to reach out and say "Hi. I'm so-and-so. Will you be my friend?"
Maybe that person might be feeling inadequate in all that they have ever done in their life and they have never been given the encouragement on the things they have done well. They may have lost the desire to even try anymore.
Maybe that person has been relied on so much and looked at as "the strong one" in all situations in life (especially if that situation included extended family) that they haven't been "allowed" to grieve when needed. This person needed to hold everyone else up in times of trial, but in truth, this person is just looking for someone to hold their hand for a change and say "Don't worry. Things will be OK. I'm here if you need me."
This makes you think doesn't it? What type of person do you want to be? The type that will judge on sight or the person that will reach out and extend the hand of friendship? Will you be the person who gives a smile to a struggling mamma in the grocery store? Will you be the person who really notices a special needs person as the child of God they truly are? Or will you be the one to turn your head and walk away from an opportunity to lift someone up?
I'm not perfect. I never have been and I know that I never will be. BUT, I know that I can work on changing how I look at others. It is difficult, I know, but I also know that when we look at others as children of Heavenly Father, the world becomes a little bit better for everyone.
May you find it in your heart to stop yourself from judging and criticizing others. Take a moment to remember that you don't know them well enough to make that call. There is only one person who truly knows what is going on in the life of others, and the one who truly knows is NOT you. Put your faith and trust in Him to right the wrongs and lift your thoughts and actions in kindness to others.
My thanks to an amazing author +Melanie Mason for sharing the video link. Thank you for opening my eyes! Also, thank you for being an amazing sister-in -law!
My daughter sent me this picture the other day and it really made me think:
The funny thing about this is the fact the sign in literally in the middle of NOWHERE! There isn't a street corner, no intersection, no NOTHING!! Just a field of corn. How boring can that possibly be. I should know, I see fields of corn EVERY day!
But, with the picture she sent this message to me:
"sometimes we just need to stop and take in our surroundings and see where God has placed us at that time. ...Be thankful for what you have."
Now I know that she is my child. She is even starting to think like I do, kinda. But really, what she said made me stop and think. Have I taken the time to ponder why I am where I am? Have I thought about why God has placed a figurative stop sign right here in this time of my life? When I am having a bad day, do I ask "why me? why now?" or do I try to figure out why I was given the bad day in the first place? For most of these situations, the answer is NO. But on occasion I do literally stop in the middle of it all and THINK about the WHY.
A new school year has started for my family and with that comes new experiences and challenges. The biggest one is my daughter starting college. She is only 40 minutes from home, but already I am feeling the effects of her absence. She is even of the attitude that she can make it in life on her own without her mamma. Although I am thrilled to think that I raised her right and with a strong desire to progress on her own and see what happens, I do miss her. It would also be nice if she were to at least make me feel a little better by pretending to still need me, just a tiny bit.
My son started first grade and I thought we were going to have some issues. On Back-to-School night he held onto my waist in a death grip that nothing could break. He wouldn't talk to his new teacher and he defiantly wouldn't come out from behind me to even look at her. One week later school started and everything changed.
When I walked him to school and into his classroom, he gave the teacher a great big hug and didn't even glance back at his mamma. Not more than two hours later, I get a call from the school. Now, if you are a mamma of school-age children, you don't dread anything more than a call from their school. Especially if it is on the first day! They told me there had been a small accident in that my son had been playing outside on the playground and a stick from a low-hanging branch of a tree jabbed him in the head and that he was bleeding.
I tell you, WORST CALL EVER!!!
I scooped up my youngest daughter, grabbed my car keys and rushed to the school as quick as I could. I was totally prepared for the worst possible situation ever. Mainly cuz when my boy gets the tiniest of owies, he squeals like a stuck pig and just gets louder as the time goes on - especially if you tell him he is going to be ok.
Boy was I shocked to find him sitting calmly on the couch in the office without the slightest indication that he had been injured in any way - except that his hair was now tinted blood-red instead of his normal blonde and there was blood on his clothes.
I was impressed with how he had gone straight to the office and calmly stated "I hit my head" then let the office staff clean him up as best they could and didn't show any sign of distress. He was even able to rattle off his phone number for them so they wouldn't have to look it up. When I got there, he let me finish cleaning him up without so much as a whimper. I was able to get his hair back to blonde, put him in a clean shirt and walk him back to class. When he got back to class the teacher greeted him with great concern and told him that he was "a tough guy" and his friends were excited to see him again. He made it the rest of the day and even came home happy.
Now I am starting to wonder if I am needed in my son's life anymore ---- well, maybe just a little. I am trying to focus on what this particular "stop sign" is trying to teach me. I love my children more than life itself and it is soooo hard to see them growing up and moving on without me. I just hope that I can be there for them when they come to their own "stop sign".
So, I love this picture:
Sometimes we don't feel exactly brave and up to the task of dealing with the things that life throws our way. I have learned the hard lesson of "FAKE IT TIL YOU MAKE IT" A LOT this past couple of weeks. Let me tell you, it has been an up and down roller coaster that I wish I could jump off of, but in the end the ride really was worth the trip. I even learned things along the way.
I was recently placed in a situation that I didn't want to be in. I'd been having a really crummy day and I was at my mamma limit with "kid antics". I just wanted to have the "saving grace" of my sweet hubby when he walks through the door to give me a tiny 5 minute break. That was not meant to be.
Instead, I had to head over to the local park for a church party without said hubby (until later that is). I was completely drained - if you are a mamma you know EXACTLY what I am talking about! I sat there "venting" to my dear friend about the things that I was exhausted with when the bishop's wife came to me and asked if I would pass out a couple of games for the "more mature" members of our church. I REALLY didn't want to do this, but she was VERY persistent in her request. So, I pulled up my figurative "boot straps", plastered a smile on my face and set out to do the job.
I went from one person to another with a "fake" smile on my face and then after awhile of helping the "mature members" laugh and put a smile on their face, I started to feel better about the day. There wasn't a single person that I talked to, and convince to take a game, that didn't laugh or smile in some small way. I could see their burden become a bit lighter because I was willing to give them a tiny bright spot to look at even for just one minute. My smile started to become genuine and I really did feel lighter. I felt like I could handle things for the rest of the night. I was even able to have a greater love for both my kids and my hubby after all was said and done.
Lesson: Even if you don't feel like doing something, or if you feel you can't do something, do it anyway. You never know who's life needs to be touched by your smile. You will also start to notice that you are "faking" it less and "making" it more.
